1 post tagged “bad advice”

Everyone knows that following bad advice can have disastrous consequences that are entirely our own to live down.  The person giving advice does not always feel obliged to share the responsibility if things go wrong, and even if they do, it's not really their skin in the game.  So most of us learn over time to recognize bad advice for what it is and politely ignore it.

But this can be hard.  Sometimes the adviser is motivated by perfectly good intentions or they are going out of their way to give us the advice.  Ignoring them may seem arrogant or nescient.  Other times the adviser is a passionate person, prepared to go to great lengths to ensure the advice is properly heard.  It takes supreme self-control to acknowledge such a person's contribution without being talked into some folly.

The worst is, however, if the adviser is an authority figure, like a parent, a teacher, or a priest.  These people are explicitly presumed to work in our interest while being blessed with great experience and insight.  Ignoring their advice is not merely opinionated, it's downright rebellious.  You don't only disagree with one person, you disagree with the entire culture.  The culture established that relationship; the society placed the adviser in their position.  At the very least, you need to explain yourself and give a good reason for the perceived impertinence.  If you are not convincing, you'll be labeled a troublemaker.  At worst, you face ostracism or coercion.

And yet, the choice is easy.  Neither the "society" nor the teacher will personally bear the consequences.  The basic principle of self-preservation requires one to still reject bad advice.